It’s one of the most awkward situations around a wedding: someone you invited to the ceremony/reception didn’t provide a gift. Maybe it’s even a member of your wedding party. How do you handle it the next time you see them? When it comes to weddings, Birkat Elyon has seen it all. They have years of experience providing dazzling, high-quality CZ rings, from engagement to wedding to special occasion pieces. So here are their expert tips for handling the delicate etiquette regarding a guest who didn’t provide a wedding gift.
First, keep in mind that guests (as well as members of your bridal party) are not obligated to provide a gift. It’s not a given. Of course, most people will, but just in case…
Wait Things Out
During the first month after the ceremony, wedding presents will continue to show up. The traditional rule is, guests have up to a year to give you a gift. So just chill for a little bit.
Send A Note (Or Not)
Two to three months after a no-show gift, you might send a note thanking them for attending your wedding. Specifically letting your guest know that you’re grateful for their presence at your big day might trigger a “Did you get my gift?” message on their end. Because there are many instances when a package gets sent to the wrong place, stolen, misplaced, you name it; a gentle note may solve the mystery. Plus, it’s a nice touch to let them know how much you appreciate them having been there to celebrate with you.
However, there’s another school of thought that puts the onus on the gift-sender. If they have yet to get a timely “thank you” note from you, they should reach out to see if the present was received on your end.
Do what feels best for you.
Let It Go
After four months or so, just assume you’re not receiving a wedding present from that person. It’s a bit impolite on their end, but it’s really impolite to bring it up to them, so just learn to let it go. And it bears repeating: you’re not “owed” a gift. At the end of the day, your relationship with them is worth much more than another gravy boat.
What About the Bridal Party?
There have been cases where a bridesmaid doesn’t give a gift to the bride. In that instance, they may feel that the expense they’ve incurred with the dress, shower, travel costs, whatever is their “gift” to you. Follow the above rules, and again, the connection you have with them is what’s most important.
When it comes to the dicey situation of not getting a wedding present, learn to be graceful about it. It is not the biggest problem in the world. Just enjoy the wonderful memories and moments from your wedding day – those are what last.